twentyfudgingfive to life.

You know how there comes a time when what you decide at that moment has the potential to shape your future? Well, when one of those times was obviously when I got into dentistry. But it feels like that time has come again. And I'm at an absolute loss about what to do. Do I practice general dentistry? Do I work with someone else or open my own clinic? Do I go for the postgraduation hassle? Which specialty do I pick? Where best do I train in that specialty from? Will they even let me train there? Is postgraduation even worth it? How about when they say that dentistry is itself a specialized field? Do I even want to do Dentistry? Do I want to work eight to ten hours a day pouring over people's mouth's in a 10' by 10' room? Do I even want to stay in Pakistan? But do I really want to give up everything here and go to some foreign land and start over? Do I even wanna get out of bed today?! 

It's been that kind of a day. 

I'm Watching Humans.

Hi. Let’s update all my non-existent readers to the goings-on in Sajeel’s life.

I have a big exam coming up on the 12th of August, which if I pass, will lead to a four year training program in some dentistry specialty at a good university hopefully, but then there are all the other programs with their own entrance exams that’re coming up after that and I still haven’t decided which is best for me, I’ll be going the long way of applying for them all.

Said exam has not been prepared well for as of this post, so temper runs high and spirits low.

I hate my roommate.

I miss my old roommate. He got cancer and has recently undergone chemotherapy and a bone marrow transplant (he says it didn’t hurt much) and has lost all his hair and is currently focusing on growing it back.

I didn’t know what else to get the parents for their birthday so I got them both nice mugs from Haroons.

I changed my number because I’d had about enough of dropped signals and poor internet so I got Zong and Zong got me and it sounds funny but less annoying people can contact me now hah.

All Ramazan, I’ve had this messed up routine of staying awake too long when I should really be sleeping and then sleeping too long when I should really be studying.

Today, I was taking a picture for my instagram and I’d carefully balanced my book on my leg while doing so but I slid and went straight into this puddle. Yep. Hope it was worth it, said picture!

I got a packet of Haribo’s peaches for my birthday.

I don’t understand the Dawn of Justice trailer and Mr. Robot gave me a headache.

My laptop harddisk crashed and burned so I lost everything precious I had in the digital world and now my computer is empty. Empty, I tell you.

The assistant at the clinic showed me her cut wrists and her stash of Xanax and I told her she had a problem. She laughed and swallowed a couple anyway.

In a land
Created for the pure
You become a citizen
When you affirm
Some countrymen are
I signed it too
And killed
A part of me.

--Confession. By RR. Jan 14, 2015.